Wednesday, 27 September 2017

Alcohol and Driving

So, the mayor of London has put Uber on the naughty step. 

I imagine that they will stay there for a couple of months, thinking about what they've done, then they'll proffer an apology and promise to start treating their drivers properly, report serious incidents in their cabs to the police and, you never know, maybe even pay some tax.

Then they'll be given their license back (thereby saving the jobs of 40,000 drivers - hurrah!) and told that they'd better keep getting smiley faces on the reward chart, or else.

A while back, the thought of living in the capital with no Uber would have been rather terrifying, but not now, because I am my own mini-cab!

One of the very best things about giving up booze, (along with the fact that, having lost the muffin top, I can now see my feet! And I can afford to buy great shoes to put on them!) is being able to drive ALL THE TIME.

If Mr SM and I have a 'date night' in a fancy West End restaurant, I don't need to book an expensive taxi to get us there and back. Oh no. I just drive and park right outside. Because nobody drives into central London at night time, so you can park anywhere. For free.

If I go to a party, when I decide it's time to go (usually in the middle of someone telling me a 'hilarious' story for the third time), I don't have to find the host to ask for the number for a cab firm, then try to sound sober while I book the cab, then try to look sober when I climb into it.

Oh no, I just leave surreptitiously, find my car (which is usually right outside) and drive home.

I even offer lifts around to all my drunk friends. It's a great way to stock up some brownie points, (or maybe make up for past misdemeanours). It's amazing how popular being a 'designated driver' can make you.

And one of the real joys is being able to sail past police cars confidently, knowing that there is absolutely no way that you are over the limit. 

In fact, I have been known to deliberately drive 'erratically' around police cars in the hope that they will breathalyse me, so I can watch with huge smugness while the light remains stubbornly on GREEN.

Even if you are incredibly responsible about drinking and driving, and always take a taxi or public transport home, there's always the niggling fear that you might just still be over the limit in the morning. On the school run. Or driving into work. 

Give up drinking, and that's totally impossible.

So, yet another fine reason to quit the booze.

In other news this week, the makers of Jaffa Cakes, in their wisdom, have decided to cut the number of biscuits (cakes?) in a pack from twelve to ten. It's a disaster.

During my early days of not drinking I mainlined Jaffa Cakes. Ten would not have been enough, would barely have touched the sides.

New this week on the SoberMummy Facebook page: some fabulous women talking to the BBC about giving up booze, the stories (and before and after pictures!) of fifteen celebs who have gone sober, including Angelina, Adele, Samuel L. Jackson and Drew Barrymore, and the funniest video I've seen in ages.

For inspiration, information and a few good laughs every weekday at wine o'clock, join the SoberMummy Facebook page. CLICK HERE, and 'like' to stay updated.

Love to you all, 

SM x


  1. And 3 jaffa cakes wasn't too many calories... 4 treat helpings per pack. Now it's ruined...

  2. I just got home from a wedding. Plenty of wine and beer everywhere except in front of me. This is my first wedding reception where I haven't been drinking, and it felt a bit weird, but only for a moment.

    Then on the drive home we went past a row of cars pulled over for breath testing, and like you SM, I felt a bit cheated that I hadn't been tested :)


    1. w3stie, I have my first wedding as a sober human this Saturday (8 weeks by then!), and up until today I hadn't thought much about the reception. Your response reminded me, and now anxiety is starting to creep in. How did you fare?


      EW in Phila, PA

    2. Congrats W3stie! EW, the problem with weddings is they go on for SO long! If I were you I would plan an escape part way through where you can just go for a walk or sit in the car or something, just in case you need a break..... Good luck! Xxx

    3. It's the expectation that you will drink that is hard, but because of that I was ready. So it wasn't that difficult really. When the first bottle landed on the table there was a twinge of self-pity, but just for a second. It helps to have a filled glass of Coke Zero or something so you can say no as the bottle goes around. People don't really care if you're not drinking. Also, watching others getting drunk inoculates you against it. You can think "Was I really like that?" It's a chance to feel good about your new sober self in a way - let your smug off the chain for a while ;)

      Good luck


  3. I would just love to get pulled over and breathalised!!! Imagine how smug you would feel!!! Not been to a wedding sober yet, but I can imagine it's a long day, and also I have realised I can't dance drunk or sober??? but at least when I do get invited to a wedding and I'm sober I won't be flashing my knickers to the guy videoing the wedding!!! (Yes I actually did that at my best friends wedding, and she's got the video as eternal proof! Great!!!! Cringe!!!!) !!!!!!!!! Xxxx

  4. "on the school run"....oye vey!!!! Makes me so happy that I don't drink anymore!!! it just gives me the "heebie jeebies" just thinking about all of those hungover school runs!!! Now I want a Jaffa Cake, and I don't even know what that is!!!! xo

  5. Hey lovely SM - I've pre ordered your book. Can't wait. Lurve the Facebook page too. Boy - did I have a cringe looking back at drunken video footage from my sisters wedding. Yes at the time it was par for the course - nothing to be ashamed about. And yet - i soooooo prefer my life - and my behaviour now. And I still have lots - no - even more fun. I am one of those weirdos who loves to dance - even sober. Anyway so happy I found the lovely SM and have achieved this sober fab life. I would love to encourage any of new newbies to stick with it. Xxx

  6. I LOVE driving when we are out, especially in london Its the best feeling isn't it? I've liked the fb page and cant wait for the book. xxx