Sunday, 24 March 2019

The Best New Sober Blogs



I'm really not exaggerating when I say that blogging saved my life.

I'd tried to quit drinking many times before, and I'd kept it up for a week or two, sometimes whole months, but eventually I'd end up back where I started. Usually worse than where I'd started.

I'm often asked what made the difference this time, and the answer is simple: blogging. Here's why:

Community

In Johann Hari's amazing TED talk titled 'Everything you thought you knew about addiction is wrong' he says that the opposite of addiction is connection. It's finding a group of people who understand what you're going through and can support you and guide you that makes the difference.

In the dark days, when I was desperate for a drink, and when I was first diagnosed with breast cancer, that community held out its hand and saved me.

Giving back

Alcoholics Anonymous have 'giving back' as one of their twelve steps. Helping other people in the way that you've been helped is good for the soul. It also helps to remind you where you've been and to feel grateful for where you are, and gratitude is crucial for good mental health.

Blogging is a great way of giving back.

Mindfulness

We all know that mindfulness is a really good thing, but it's really difficult for we addicts, because we often have what's known as monkey brain. Overactive minds that just won't shut up - that's why we drank, for the dimmer switch that alcohol provides. It also makes things like meditation really, really difficult.

However, blogging, or any form of reading or writing, is a great way of practising mindfulness, and of keeping your thoughts in the moment.

Therapy

Therapists often prescribe 'journalling' as a way of aiding recovery. Writing down what you're going through and how you're feeling on a daily basis is a great way of understanding where yourself and your issues.

Remembering

One of the main reasons for falling off the wagon is because you start feeling SO much better, and then you forget how bad it was. You forget why you're doing all this. You think maybe this time it will be different. Having a blog to remind you what it was really like and why you quit is really helpful for times like these.

I get lots of messages from people who've started sober blogs, and are finding it really therapeutic, but finding readers initially is hard, particularly if you want to stay anonymous and don't want to share your blog posts on social media.

Often, by the time people have found them, they've been sober for a year already, and those readers are missing out on helping the writer through the hardest, early days.

That's why I'm writing this.

If you have recently started a sober blog, or podcast, or YouTube channel and you would like people to find you then please leave a few lines about your 'thing' and your web address in the comments below.

Also, if you have recently come across a brilliant new blog, or podcast or whatever, then please recommend it below.

If you've recently quit drinking, or want to do so, then check out the recommendations below for some new virtual friends, who are going through exactly what you are. You can help each other.

I will share this post on all the SoberMummy Facebook page, and will add it to the pages at the top of my blog, so it's always accessible if you're wanting to promote or to read.

If you get a chance to share this post too, then please do. Let's all help each other, spread the word and the love.

And if you'd like to know more about my first year blogging my way through going sober, you can read The Sober Diaries. Available from Amazon here (UK) and here (USA).

Love to you all,

SM x

64 comments:

  1. Clare you've just answered my prayers! I was literally just thinking I wish I could get my blog out there a bit more. It's called One Man and His Grog and the address is onemanandhisgrog.com
    I've just written my third blog yesterday and I got my inspiration from you. I realised there weren't as many blokes out there writing about this stuff so just wanted to tell my story really. I'm nearly 7 months sober now and it's easily the best thing I've ever done. And you have really and honestly helped me so much. You're kinda my hero, not in a weird way though! Oh no does that make it weird because I said not in a weird way?πŸ€”πŸ˜‚Thank you!πŸ™

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  2. I'm ten months sober and have recently started a new blog at https://soberkiki.home.blog. As I approach my year celebrations, I will be re-posting older posts from the beginning on to my new blog space and also posting about what I am still learning about myself now, managing trauma and battling loneliness as a sober 30+ year old in a small town.
    Your book was the first (and best) quitlit book I read and I recommend it to anybody starting their journey to get through those initial feelings we all have when we stop. Thank you for sharing your story and for giving other people a platform to share theirs.

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  3. I'm wondering how to start a blog. I'm keeping a diary, which is great but would like to share my thoughts and experiences too

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    1. Wordpress is a good place to start! All explained on there really πŸ‘πŸ»πŸ‘πŸ»πŸ‘πŸ» Good luck! Xxxxxx

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  4. Reading your blog and book is what helped me on my journey along with my own website and blog. Sharing stories and giving back is what inspires and motivates me every day and what gives me joy is knowing that as I continue on my own path, my writings, course and videos are helping so many other people too. I agree with you, that community and sharing, getting stuff 'out' is a huge help and I probably wouldn't be here now if you hadn't been brave and shared your own story. Thank you! You can follow my story and get my tips, help, tools and advice on https://sober-bliss.com/

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  5. I've also started a diary/blog at mindfulmadeline.simplesite.com
    It's really helpful to write things down.

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  6. I started Be Sober when I quit drinking and it has exploded into an incredible online community with a wonderful private Facebook group. You can visit the blog at www.besober.co.uk and join the group from the link on the page. Simon

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  7. I'm 4 months sober and I put my thoughts down at https://soberfreedom.home.blog . Love your site, and reading this and The Sober Diaries has been so helpful ��

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  8. Thank you so much for being an incredible sober champion as always, Clare.

    I started my blog nearly nine months ago and it documents my secret struggle with alcohol dependence and my decision to go sober. I'm female, 32 years old and have been married for nearly four years.

    My marriage had *always* revolved around boozy socials with friends, late night dinners charged with wine and just general black-out moments which would always lead to disapproving arguments with the husband.

    I was nervous to go sober in such a 'drink-dependent' marriage but I did, and writing about my challenges along the way has certainly helped me to stay on the straight and narrow.

    Long story short it's the best decision I've ever made.

    http://divorcingalcohol.blogspot.com/

    xx

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  9. Love the comparisons between blogging and AA Clare. My friend has just started blogging her very new sobriety. Witty, straight talking single mum - Ever Uncleare. Would love it if she could get some support. https://uncleare.com/

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  10. Claire your blog was a total game changer for me as I’ve told you a million Times!!!

    I wish I had started my blog LIFTING WEIGHTS NOT WINE on day ONE but I was too preoccupied with getting sober to think about writing- I spent my early days with my head over the laptop reading your blog from day one instead!

    I am 27 months sober now and I have sort of forgotten about the early days and that’s why I regret not keeping a diary or starting my blog then. Although my Insta page is growing from strength to strength as its keeping people motivated and showing how my love of exercise- my new “healthy “ addiction has stopped me from picking up the wine and I’m sharing my whole life changing journey on there!

    Thankyou for writing your blog Claire - without it I don’t know where I would be- and to everyone else starting blogs - let’s support each other and Spread the sober sparkle and share our journeys to inspire others!!

    Xxxxxx

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    1. Ditto to the above comment from Angie! Your blog and book was a real game changer for me too, and I have told you that heaps as well! I too wish I'd written a blog from the start but I did comment a lot on here over the months and if I ever want to know what was going on in my head I always can refer back. Thankfully the support I received here got me to where I am now, over a year AF and I am so eternally grateful for my sobriety. Loving life and hoping to help others along the way.
      Good luck everyone, big hugs, Meggie xxx

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  11. Hi Clare,

    I really liked this email. I did start a blog myself found here: https://30dayalcoholchallenge.blogspot.com/

    I have quite a few attempts under my belt with my current streak of 84 days being my best. I do relate to the "giving back" and I post on several Facebook groups everyday. Sometimes, I link the blog.

    I really enjoyed your book The Sober Diaries. I have listened to it twice now. I think it is insightful and you have a great wit about you. I smiled more than a few times.

    Anyway, I hope to continue my journey. I feel pretty good about right now. And, I will keep blogging too.

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  12. Hi Clare,

    I intermittently blogged (https://abandoningalcohol.blogspot.com) to share my trials and tribulations of 2018 living AF. It's been very interesting reading back post-2018 particularly as I've gone beyond the year and have stopped counting in days of not drinking alcohol and have graduated to months!

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  13. Thanks so much for all your addresses!
    Please also check out www.sassysobersisters.com

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  14. Clare,
    I read your book before I quit drinking and loved it. I have reread several parts since I stopped. I have found your writing to be very relatable.
    I have started a blog and could use your help getting readers. It is my story as a grandmother in her 60’s who has finally quit drinking. Mimistumblesoutofthebottle.home.blog

    Keep sharing your thoughts and positive attitude. I wish you the best.
    Cheryl

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  15. I just finished your book Clare - Thank you and hello from Down Under, and Yes! as a child, I frequently imagined digging through the middle of this Ball we all bounce on and find myself in upside down land staring at the Queen!
    I also believed that royalty grew up quicker than 'normal' human beings..
    Thank you for your Book. Thank you for sharing your Magnificent Story - and especially hovering the penny that almost split my skull when it dropped regarding really - Really - REALLY understanding what it means to be a Grown Up!!
    I could write pages about the reasons I loved your Sober Diaries - Today though to keep it short and work out how this 'Blog Stuff Works' and attempt to create my own diary, just letting you know - I looked at a photo of a much Younger - 4 year old me - I am now 50. And I asked the question " Would you want this for her?" - I am not a Mother, but, I met 'her' as one, in a sense, and I cried. She deserved and deserves so much more XXX Thank you from the other side of the pond - Australia xxx Al

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    1. Hey Al, good luck on your sober journey, I hope sobriety brings you everything you deserve xxx

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    2. Thank you Anonymous - You too xxx

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  16. Perfect for where I am at! I'll be starting this week to share the journey of a highly functioning individual. You'll be able to read more (later this week) at life-in-high-heels.blogspot.com

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  17. Listening to Sober Diaries audiobook right now and started blogging as a result. I can so relate and hope others can to me as well! On Day 5 of sobriety as we speak. You can find me here nomorepinot.blogspot.com

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  18. Your book has prompted me to get it all out (so to speak) on a blog...https://disappearingmum.blogspot.com/. You are possibly one of very few people who understand how hard it is to change! thank you for kicking me up the arse. Jxx

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  19. Alcoholism, or alcohol dependence, is a disease that causes. Craving - a strong need to drink. Loss of control - not being able to stop drinking once you've started. Physical dependence - withdrawal symptoms. Visit https://www.tryrehabfirst.com for more information.

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  20. Hello Clare from Aotearoa New Zealand! I'm a little excited reading the above as I would love to fold myself deep into the sober blogging community and bring my blog https://sobernotesbyangie.blogspot.com/ to the party. I wrote about you and your book almost a year ago, I've never read a book so fast, I wanted to eat it, actually eat it so the words were inside me. Reading your book changed my thinking and my life, I stayed sober for the first time in a long time just so I could read it. I've annoyingly (a gross understatement) relapsed since but I'm more determined than ever now to save my life with sobriety. Thank you Clare for your book, it really was a game-changer x

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  21. I forgot to add this link, www.livingsober.org.nz it's a wonderful community of people supporting each other with kind encouragement. I post updates there on my progress, I reached a week sober yesterday and woke this morning to a stream of encouragement and congratulations, waking up to that really helps strengthen the decision to not drink today !

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  22. Desperately trying to become sober but not finding it easy. I’m not a bottle of wine a night girl, I can manage one glass or one g&t, I’m a binge drinker. I started drinking very young, pretty much as soon as I started secondary school really. I’ve always, always used booze as my social crutch, I honestly don’t believe I’m any fun on a night out without it. I’m the one people tell stories about, (guess what Lisa got up to last night). I’ve always suffered from THE WORST HANGOVERS! So, recently I managed 63 days sober. Then a friend of mine came to stay, one of the school friends I started drinking with. She’s had the shittest time recently. She’s living my worst nightmare, her husband died last january, suddenly and unexpectedly, leaving behind her and her 3 lovely boys. We went to the royal Albert hall to see one of our favourite 90s bands. How could I not get tipsy with my friend and behave like we did in the good old days? I caved and drank. Not lots, I got tipsy and stopped, I drank lots of water too. Since then I’ve not drank lots, the odd glass of wine or g&t. I feel like if I stop my husband looses his drinking partner, my friends won’t invite me out, I’ll stop being fun and all that will be left is boring baggy me. I’m on holiday at the moment yesterday I finished your book, I told my husband I really want to be alcohol free forever, he said he’d support me whatever but I could see in his eyes, he’s a little disappointed. He’s a much bigger boozer than me, he works in the propert industry, he’s a chartered surveyor (estate surveying) he deals with large property investments and his industry is renowned for heavy drinking, it’s how we met, I worked in the same industry once. After our chat yesterday, we had a date night in our all inclusive hotel, how funny that after I finished your book and told him I wanted to become sober I got smashed last night and didn’t sleep a wink and have a terrible hangover today! Help!

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  23. Not boring and baggy, boring and naggy! πŸ˜‚

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  24. Hi all, I've started blogging at abbyanon.wordpress.com
    Like many of you, hoping to keep myself accountable and find some community.

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  25. Thanks for this Clare, I loved your TED talk, shared it on social media and got my mother to watch it, who hasn't quit yet! You, and those like you gave me the strength to finally stop drinking 14 months ago. Thank you so much! My blog, which is to help people quit and find happiness is called www.happysoberyogamummy.com x

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  26. I'm just at the start of what I suspect is going to be a very long journey, I've started blogging that here - https://andasoftdrinkforhim.blogspot.com/

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  27. I have many blogs posted on my website for moms
    www.sobermomsguide.com

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  28. Hey Y'all
    I read your book around a year ago I guess, the very first time I became concerned about tendency to over-serve myself almost nightly with wine. I loved it and found such inspiration especially with your ability to share your struggle with us. You are truely amazing and very much appreciated. Im attempting my own journey again and am also new to blogging. For anyone else on this journey, beginning or old timers feel free to check out my blog. Non-alcoholic-country-chick.home.blog. just a working mama of 4, adjusting to country life non-alcoholic. Best of luck to all and hope to hear from you! Love Kay

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  29. Thanks for sharing this blog, this blog is very helpful information for every one.
    do i need rehab
    i need rehab
    alcohol rehab uk

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  30. Hi,

    Please see my new blog at www.soberdaysarehappydays.com or google soberdaysarehappydays. I'm trying to stay as anonymous as possible so it's difficult to get my blog out there! Social media is so powerful for these things, but I'm not ready to 'out' myself just yet!!

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  31. Thanks Clare. Love your blog and your book was amazing! My blog is https://soberandsparkly.blogspot.com/ if anyone wants to have a look. I'm 30 and have been sober over 2 years - just wanted to start sharing my experience!

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  32. I also have just started blogging in hope of having accountability and maybe finding tribe. Please visit Armeiscenomore@wordpress.com

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  33. I just started a blog. https://momhasadrinkingproblem.blogspot.com/

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  34. You need to take part in a contest for one of the greatest sites on the web. I am going to highly recommend this website!
    sober living santa monica

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  35. I’m on week 3 and have started my blog https://sobermamabear.blogspot.com/ Would love some followers / feedback!

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  36. I really like reading through a post that can make people think. Also, many thanks for permitting me to comment!
    sober living near me

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  37. Hi Clare, I'm reading "The Sober Diaries" right now and I love it! Thanks so much for helping out other bloggers! I'm a 52 year old Canadian woman who quit drinking 10.5 months ago. I created a blog a week ago because I know I need to reach out to others on this same path if I want to keep being successful at this alcohol-free living thing. My blot is onewinelesswoman@blogspot.com

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  38. I have recently started a blog called "This AF Life" (thisaflife.com). Also reading your book and really enjoying it! Thanks for helping pave the way to make becoming alcohol-free more normalized and mainstream. :-)

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  39. Hi everybody. I've recently begun blogging at Recovery Spritz, (recoveryspritz.blogspot.com). Its a place to celebrate the wins of being sober, and also reflect on a little of the darkness from before. I would really love it if you could stop by and leave a comment. Thanks so much, RS x

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  40. My husband is 4 years and 4 months sober and has recently started a blog called, "If these wall's could talk". The address is https://aadougiefresh.blogspot.com
    It's a collection of inspiring moments, quotes and stories from meetings he's attended over the course of his recovery told through a somewhat humourous lens.

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  41. Hi, I've just started a blog about taking an extended break from alcohol and trying to lose some weight too. If anyone wants to take a look, it's thoroughlymoderatemillie.blogspot.com

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  42. Hi All – my name is Daniel and I would love to share Reformed Characters with you.

    Reformed Characters is a new non-alcoholic lifestyle brand with a difference.

    We seek to spark conversations, inform and inspire peoples decisions around alcohol. We are for the outright drunk, sober-curious, ‘sober’, and everyone in-between.

    On the wagon, off the wagon, and in an Uber along the side waving from a distance – we are for everyone no matter
    where you are in your journey!

    www.reformedcharacters.com

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  43. Hi Clare and all other aspiring or currently sober Moms Dads and people in general. I devoured Clare's wonderful book in two nights and I am here to start my own journey and find a safe community.
    https://surethismakessense.blogspot.com/

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  44. Hi Clare!
    I read your book last week in a few days and loved it. I have like you tried soooo many times to stop. The best effort ever was earlier this year and I got to 85 days but then caved when lockdown happened. I have now got myself back to it and am currently on day 5. I have always written a journal for myself but I really want to blog now after reading your book. I have set up a bl
    og on blogger though but for some reason (I am rubbish at tech!) - I can't seem to find my own blog on any search engine and I just don't know why.... ;-( any help would be appreciated.
    its called https://ontrackandliving.blogspot.com

    thank you!

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  45. Hello agan. I am messaging again as I seem to be getting somewhere and I think my blog is visible after all, but I didn't realise it was only viewable to people on blogger and I may need to change it to word press (as one of the comments above suggested.If anyone here see this and is on blogger, if you could juts leave one comment for me I would appreciate it sooo much. thanks,

    https://ontrackandliving.blogspot.com

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  46. I loved your book Clare. We're giving quitting a go in the lead up to my husband having a big heart operation next year. We're nearly 5 weeks in and life has changed. I'm so calm and feeling so good. No weight loss yet, ice cream has been my friend, but I'm feeling enormous clarity and my creativity is soaring. I have been writing a blog too which I have found enormously helpful. I'm not ready to be anything other than anonymous yet, it can be found here https://secretsoberyogi.blogspot.com/

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  47. I've read and listened to a lot of Quit Lit, and your book was the first to REALLY connect with and inspire me. Thank you for sharing your story. Inspired by you, I'm starting to share mine:

    https://showingupsober.blogspot.com/

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  48. Hello everyone and thank you for this wonderful opportunity to talk to likeminded people. I am 10 weeks sober and, if I'm honest, losing a bit of enthusiasm. I've forgotten what a hangover feels like and now I just feel fat because I've never eaten so much chocolate in my life. Lockdown is just boring now and the wine witch is starting to grin! I've started my blog betteroffsober1.blogspot.com to meet new people in this virtual world that we have found ourselves in. Congratulations to everyone who is on their sober journey. It's not easy. Sometimes it takes everything you have to just say no. Please visit my blog if you get a minute. There's nothing earthshattering there but as Beatty says, it's good to talk!

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    Replies
    1. Hello, I’ve recently started a recovery blog...ksoberdiaries.com. To share thoughts , struggles ideas etc. Please check it out😊

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  49. Hello, I’ve recently started a recovery blog and would love to hear thought, struggles, ideas etc. ksoberdiaries.com Please check it out😊

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  50. Interesting and useful info. Thanks.

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  51. Clare, thank you so much for your blog and your book. I related so much to your story...and to coping with emotions with wine. I'm nearing the six month mark for sobriety...and feel a little alone. (Pandemic doesn't help that) All that's to say, I'm entering the blogosphere and am grateful for this post and for connecting with others on this journey.

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  52. Hi, thank you for suggesting this feature, the reason i write my blog is to keep things fresh in my mind of how bad things used to be, and to give the still suffering addict hope that change is possible. Everyone's rock bottom is different, i had to lose everything including my job, marriage, kids, driving licence, friends, family and lastly both my sanity and my liberty. I was also diagnosed with cirrhosis of the liver and given between 8 months and a year to live if i carried on drinking and abusing my body, Id been admitted to hospital 9 times due to over dosing on alcohol, I had tried rehab four times, AA, NA, going cold turkey (I do not advise this) and after being taken to hospital twice in 1 week i was given the gift of desperation and left hospital and crawled, literally, into an AA meeting and that was three years and 5 months ago. Please feel free to visit my blog, its not about the problem its all about the solution, its about hope, freedom, advice, mental health and other bits like recommendations for tried and tested blogs, books, podcasts, music, hobbies and links to other info, please take a look and if what you read is of interest to you please follow me and leave comments or email me and i will get back to you always. The blog is https://justanotherjorjdoe.blogspot.com/
    After very recently noticing my thinking becoming "wonky" Ive decided to blog daily like a diary for me and others and mainly so i am accountable. I look forward to hearing from people soon xxx

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  53. Women's sober living Thanks for a very interesting blog. What else may I get that kind of info written in such a perfect approach? I’ve a undertaking that I am simply now operating on, and I have been at the look out for such info.

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  54. I write about alcoholism (what the problem is) and recovery (what to do about it) here:
    https://lyingminds.sixboats.co.nz/

    I also have two books available to read online there and you can download them for free. "Lying Minds" describes the condition; how it forms, grows and manifests itself, and "Sobrietry" is a sober toolbox of what we can do can help ourselves stop and stay stopped.

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  55. I write about the days of early sobriety and thoughts about general drinking culture and changes. Hoping I can reach some people the way I've been helped on here, and also using the blog to make myself accountable https://justfinewithoutwine.blogspot.com/


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  56. Hi! I am a sober blogger... I got through 30 days and then utterly backtracked two days ago. So I'm just beginning my sober days from Day 2...My blog is called:
    Daphnedoesnotdrink.com (Daphne does not drink) or you can head to
    vibrantandlight.com as well. I am staying anonymous for now...

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  57. I write about the day by day from Day 1 working to stay AF. https://justfinewithoutwine.blogspot.com/

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  58. I have just started to blog tonight- I felt inspired by you all. I am new to this but I am going to do it!
    https://anewpatchinmylife.blogspot.com/

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  59. I have just hit day 7, and have also started a blog - please take a look, like, and follow, everyone is welcome, the more the merrier

    https://moderationisjustnotforme.wordpress.com/

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