Sunday 6 March 2016

The Comfort Zone

I was reading an interview in the Times Magazine with a tech millionaire.

He said that his new life mantra is inspired by a cheesy Facebook meme. It's a Venn diagram with two circles. One is labelled THE COMFORT ZONE, and the other is labelled WHERE THE MAGIC HAPPENS.

There is no overlap between the two circles.

This is a really neat summary of my life!

My theory is that we 'enthusiastic drinkers' are people who have always hated stepping outside our comfort zones.

That's why we love drinking; because it allows us to expand that zone to include all sorts of things that would usually make us feel edgy.

Suddenly our world seems so much bigger and more accessible!

The problem is we get so used to equating the comfort zone with alcohol, that the number of things that we are happy doing sober shrinks and shrinks, until we are fearful shadows of our former selves.

When we quit, we have to get used to constantly stepping out of that zone, to dealing with fear, anxiety, the unknown.

It's really hard.

Until you realise that outside the zone is where the magic happens!

Think back to those times in your life when you felt genuinely high, because you'd achieved something brilliant. I bet they'd been preceded by at least a dollop of fear, and butterflies in the stomach?

So, next time you're feeling scared and anxious, and you really want a drink to 'take the edge off', and to get you back to that warm, comfortable space, think this instead:

"Well done me! I am awesome. I am feeling like this because I'm on an adventure, going to where the magic happens...." Then wait and see where it takes you.

Happy Mother's Day to all my UK readers!

Love SM x


  1. Nearly there!!! Loving being AF today xxx

  2. Love this concept! Thank you, SM...thank you for your words. You have inspired me to go AF after 15 years of love/hate relationship with wine. I have reached the 8 day mark today, and I would have never been able to do this without your blog. I devoured it in just a few days, and I continue to go back to many entries daily to help continue on this path. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.

    Heather xx

    1. Welcome Heather! Well done you! So glad you found us xxx

  3. Hi SM, all depends what you put in the circles but creativity is always a tricky one. A lot of life sucks and is brutally unfair - sober or drunk but it is still there in the morning whether sober or hungover. 64 days for me tonight and am starting to get introspective - at least during my drive back to West London tonight. I think I have always lacked a decent role model, not in a what can I blame my life on way but what might have bent me away from my chosen path. What made me so biddable and easy prey for the stereotypical image that resulted in a very definite lack of restraint and self-control? As I said, introspective tonight but still here. I hope you had a fine Mothering Sunday.


  4. I love this SM. Your insight into drinking is bloody marvellous - thanks! This has been very true for me, particularly as I climbed the corporate ladder and feelings of being a fraud and ill-equipped for my new board-level role flooded to the surface. I numbed feelings of inadequacy and insecurity with booze. Now with almost 11 months AF under my belt, I've got a renewed sense of satisfaction and perspective with my career and EVERY aspect of my life. Hope you had a soooper doooper mother's day lovely lady xxx

  5. So relate to your comment about feeling a fraud. As a university lecturer I spent 33 years waiting to be found out! Well done on your 64 days, I am on 64 days too. X

  6. So relate to your comment about feeling a fraud. As a university lecturer I spent 33 years waiting to be found out! Well done on your 64 days, I am on 64 days too. X

  7. I love that diagram! I love your assessment of it from an alcoholic angle and can agree with it with some of my experience too.
    Indeed this one is making me think on... thanks