Walking Away From Booze

Sometimes the simplest things are the best.

I find that walking is an invaluable sober tool. For a whole host of reasons. Here are five of them:

1. It has no booze associations

However much of a hardened drinker you are/were it is unlikely that you used to go for a walk with a glass of Chardonnay in hand.

(In my case, walking was one of the few occasions when I wouldn't have a glass of wine nearby).

That's why it's a perfect activity around wine o'clock, when you really, really want a drink. Just go. Walk out the door. (I'm channelling my inner Gloria Gaynor here).

Get away from the fridge, the wine rack, the irritations of home and walk. Walk until you feel better.

(N.B. Remember to plan a route that does not go past your favourite pub or bottle shop).

2.  It's a natural drug.

We enthusiastic imbibers rather like our drugs, our highs. And walking is a natural high. It releases serotonin which boosts your mood.

Numerous studies have shown that walking helps reduce depression, anxiety and can even ward off Alzheimer's.

3. It can be social

I avoided parties for a while. But I'm a sociable person. I wouldn't want an alcohol free life that turned me into a hermit.

So, even in the days when I avoided going out too much in the evenings, I would arrange to meet friends during the day for a dog walk.

I'd spend an hour of the day drinking coffee, catching up with an old friend and getting myself, and the dog, fit. That's multitasking ;-)

4. It blitzes the belly

One of the best consolation prizes for ditching the booze is losing weight, especially the dreaded wine belly (see my post: Wine Bellies Can Kill).

Walking not only burns calories and builds muscle, but it can improve your body's response to insulin which leads to reduced belly fat.

5. It reduces your risk of chronic disease

Again, there are a huge number of studies showing that walking can be a wonder drug.

It lowers your blood sugar and, therefore, your risk of diabetes, it lowers blood pressure and your risk of heart disease and stroke, and it reduces your risk of cancer - especially breast and colon cancer.

When I first had the cancer diagnosis (eight months after I quit drinking. To read my story, click here), and I knew that easiest and quickest way to blot it all out, to silence all the thoughts of death and motherless children, would be to pour a large glass of wine (and then drink the whole bottle), walking saved me.

I would take the dog out to the nearest park and then howl. Literally.

(I once bumped into a school gate Mum while doing this. It was what the children would describe as #awks).

Walking calmed my thoughts. It made me feel happier - or at least less desperate. And, crucially, it got me away from the vino.

But tonight I may just be overdoing it on the walking front.

#1 and I are doing the Moonwalk (she's only just old enough, so will be one of the youngest there).

It's a twenty six mile walk through the centre of London with thousands of other women (and some men) all decked out in decorated bras (even the men), in aid of breast cancer charities.

We've raised nearly £2,500 between us, so we've got to make it through to the end!

We set off at 10pm, and should finish at around 7am. I haven't been up all night for a very long time, and certainly not because I was walking. Wish us luck!

I'm not going to post my Moonwalk fundraising page because I'm still a little twitchy about my own anonymity, and a lot twitchy about my daughter's

However if you would like to support us, and help other women dealing with breast cancer, then please please visit my Justgiving page in support of the Haven Breast Cancer Support Centre.

Here's the link: www.justgiving.com/sober-mummy

THANK YOU!

Love SM x

Random Acts of Kindness

Regular readers may remember that about six weeks ago I sent a letter to my local council. It went like this:

Dear Sir/Madam,

re: Parking Contravention Notice XXXXX

I do apologise. I accidentally parked in a bay that was temporarily suspended. I misread the date on the sign. It was entirely my fault, and I put your people to some trouble having to tow my car away.

However, the reason I misread the date was that I had just received a cancer diagnosis and my head was all over the place.

I realise that this does not mean you should cancel the fine, but - if you were to - it would restore my faith in humanity.

Should you wish to verify my story, please do call Prof X at the beast cancer unit, XX hospital.

Go on - make my day. I could do with some good news.

Kind regards

Mrs M.

Well, I've had no response at all from this letter. Nada. Zip.

This is a little odd, as whenever I've argued parking tickets in the past (which I almost always do, as a point of principle) I always get a response - either positive or negative (usually negative) - within three or four weeks.

So, I went on line and typed in my Parking Charge Notice number. A message came up saying PCN NOT FOUND.

You know what this means? Some little angel in the local council read my letter, knew that they couldn't officially let me off, so they just deleted me off the system.

With one or two key strokes they have restored my faith in humanity.

I wanted to post this in the hope that, one day, that council employee will come across this blog and know that I am very, very grateful, not just because they've saved me some money that I can now spend on Christmas presents for my children, but because they made me feel good about the world and the wonderful people in it.

Council person - you rock. You are an awesome human being, and you deserve good things to happen to you.

Kindness, in my book, is the most important quality in a human being. And many studies show that practicing acts of kindness is good for us. It releases serotonin in our brains, which improves our mental health, and actually boosts our immune systems.

Plus it's good for our souls. According to the Dalai Lama “When we feel love and kindness toward others, it not only makes others feel loved and cared for, but it helps us also to develop inner happiness and peace.”

What's not to like?

So go hug a granny. Tell a friend you love them. Cancel a parking fine. Spread the joy.

Big hugs

SM x

Related Post: Smile and the World Smiles With You, Make Someone's Day

Make Someone's Day

We overly-enthusiastic-drinkers tend to be extremely lazy when it comes to looking for a mood boost.

We have one go-to default option: vino (cross out if necessary and insert your alcoholic drink of choice).

Well, here's another one. It's way better for your liver, and your long term mental health. Plus it's costs nothing.

Pay someone a compliment.

It's been scientifically proven that when we receive a compliment, our brains are flooded with serotonin. Seratonin is an amazing (free, legal and harmless) drug. It's the 'pride' drug, the 'status symbol' drug; the high quality cocaine of the brain chemistry world.

BUT, not only does the compliment receiver get a serotonin hit. So does the compliment giver.

This process of giving and receiving flattery also builds a bond between the two, which raises levels of oxytocin in both, and it fulfils our positive expectations, which adds a great big shot of dopamine.

(You know dopamine well - that's the chemical released when you had your first glass of wine of the day back in the dark days).

So, all in all, what's not to like?

I was thinking about this yesterday when listening to a piece on Radio 4 about Caitlin Moran (one of my favourite journalists) who's started handing out cards to creatively dressed strangers in the street which read I want you to know, I really appreciate your look.

What an awesome thing to do!

Imagine you are a hormonally ravaged teenager with miniscule levels of self confidence. You've spent hours in your bedroom trying on various outfits and posting pictures on Instagram to see which get the most 'likes'.

Eventually you decide on the 'least worst' option. But ten minutes after leaving the house you know you've made an error. You're about to bail, or to walk into a party with the self assurance of a gnat.

Then a total stranger gives you a card saying I really appreciate your look.

Suddenly you stand a foot taller. You are Khaleesi! You enter that room like you're being paid to turn up. Then you pull the Year 12 God you've been lusting after in remedial maths lessons, and you embark on the great adventure that is First Love. *sigh*

Later on I was parked at  traffic light. A guy on a pizza delivery bike ahead of me sped off to the front of the queue. As he did so, a leather glove fell out of his pocket.

A young bloke on the pavement spotted this, ran into the road and picked up the glove. I half expected him to nick it (that's the kind of thing that normally happens in London). But no. He ran, at full speed (as the lights were changing) through the queue of traffic, tapped the pizza guy on the shoulder and handed him the glove.

As the traffic started moving, I pulled over, wound down my window, and shouted out to the Good Samaritan "You are a truly great human being!" then drove off.

In my rear view mirror I could see him grinning. I was grinning. I could feel that serotonin, oxytocin and dopamine having a party in my head. It made my day.

We took the kids out for supper at their favourite restaurant last night. We have a running family joke at this place, as the waiter always starts by offering us 'complimentary water.'

(N.B. This is not super generous. It's tap water. Of course it should be free).

When the water arrives, decanted into two large, earthenware bottles, the children take turns picking it up and making it 'complimentary.' It goes round the table saying Wow, Mummy, I LOVE that dress on you! So slimming! Daddy, your hair is looking PLENTIFUL today! and so on.

It struck me that every meal should start with a bottle of complimentary water.

(For more on being sober and happy read my post Smile and the World Smiles With You).

Happy, sober weekend all you gorgeous, wise and wonderful people. (See what I did there?)

SM x