Showing posts with label judging others. Show all posts
Showing posts with label judging others. Show all posts

Thursday, 28 January 2016

Two Tribes

One thing I've realised after months of reading blogs and e-mails from readers, is that we 'thirsty drinkers' fall into two distinct camps.

There are those of us who describe ourselves as Binge Drinkers, and those who confess (like moi) to being Daily Drinkers.

The two tribes have huge amounts in common. But it's often the differences we focus on, and the existence of the other tribe is, bizarrely, what provides our security blanket and keeps us drinking.

Why?

Well, Binge Drinker looks at Daily Drinker and thinks okay, maybe I did get completely legless at the weekend. I behaved really badly, fell off a table, and have no idea how I got home. But I won't drink again until next weekend. I have self control. I will give my body time to detox. I'm nothing like the daily drinker who just can't stop herself. I don't have a problem.

Meanwhile, Daily Drinker looks at Binge Drinker and thinks okay, maybe I do drink every single day (sometimes at lunch time as well as in the evening). But I never look completely drunk. I don't behave really badly and fall off tables. I have self control. I'm nothing like the crazy binge drinker who just can't stop herself. I don't have a problem.

What we don't realise is that Binge Drinker, over time, has shorter and shorter breaks between the binges until they start to occur almost....daily. While Daily Drinker, over time, drinks more and more each day, until each session starts to resemble....a binge.

Their paths may start off from different places, but they're slowly converging, and they're both heading towards the same destination: rock bottom.

There is a great saying (that I posted elsewhere on this blog, back in the sands of time) that judging others does not define who they are, it defines who you are.

And the truth is that we LOVE to have a tribe to look down on, because it makes us feel better about our own problem.

Funnily enough, the other thing I've noticed is that whichever tribe we start off from, when we quit drinking our experience is exactly the same.

Join the Sober Tribe, peoples.

SM