2015 - The Year I Quit Drinking

I started 2015 imagining it was going to be a year just like the decade preceding it. I wasn't expecting any big changes at all.

As ever, my main New Year's resolution was to 'cut down' on the drinking. Not immediately on Jan 1st, obviously, but around Jan 5th, once I'd got over the hangover and got the kids back to school.

I started off resolving not to drink at all until February. That lasted a week. I then told myself I'd only drink at the weekends. Which lasted another week.

Ah ha! How about only drinking when I was out - never at home? I went out most nights that week and exhausted myself.

Finally, I decided to only drink beer. I managed that one until I'd had so many beers I thought 'sod it - I'll open a bottle of vino.'

By the end of February I was back to a bottle of wine a day, feeling toxic, fat and hating myself.

So I quit.

The first few weeks were really hard. I was exhausted all the time. I thought about booze constantly. I was convinced I'd never be able to have fun again.

I started this blog, and found people like me all over the world who travelled the journey with me, and without whom I'd never have made it.

Then, at around day 100, miracles started to happen.

I looked 5 years younger. I started losing weight - about half a pound a week, every week, without trying. I had bags of energy. I got stuff done, like decluttering, decorating, and I finished writing my novel.

By September - six months after quitting - I felt like a new person. The cloud I'd not even realised I'd been under had lifted. I re-discovered a sense of fearlessness and optimism. I became a much better Mum, better wife and better friend. I found my mojo, and felt like the world was my oyster.

Then, in October, I found A Lump. In my left boob. A 23mm invasive, lobular carcinoma, with associated DCIS, to be precise. Aka breast cancer.

I went right back to the beginning. Constantly fearful, taking one day at a time, no idea what lay ahead, or if I could handle it.

But I got through it. Sober. And, whilst I'd never say I was glad it happened, it's left me with the ability to not sweat the small stuff, and the realisation that life is short, and we have to make the most of every day we're given.

I ended the year celebrating Christmas, being cancer free and the things that really matter - family and friends - sober.

So, farewell, then 2015. The year I lost the drink and gained a life.

And a Happy New Year to all you wonderful people. I owe everything to you. Without you, 2015 would have been a very different year.

Love SM x